Parenting Information

The Financially Intelligent Parent: 8 Steps to Raising Successful, Generous, Responsible Children


What you say and do about money has a profound influence on your child. There are money moments every day that you can use to teach your children important skills and lessons about life. But what to say or do isn't always obvious. Is it a good idea to pay for chores or grades? How do you help your child develop a work ethic? How do you structure an allowance to help your child learn to make choices? Why is involving your children in charity so important? Eileen and Jon Gallo, experts in the fields of children, psychology and money, provide parents with eight key behaviors that will help them raise financially responsible children:

1. Encourage a work ethic

Work ethic is a learned behavior, and parents are the best models to teach kids to acquire it. If you want your children to work hard and derive meaning and satisfaction from what they do, make sure you are modeling the right messages. Insisting your kids do their homework and help around the house does not guarantee they will grow up with a sense of accountability and a desire to achieve. Developing a work ethic in your child is a holistic process and the eight money behaviors of a financially intelligent parent are keys to this process.

2. Get your own money stories straight

Because you send your children messages about money all the time, it is imperative that both you and your spouse are on the same page when it comes to your money stories. A money story is an open, honest and personal story of your relationship with financial issues, especially as you grew up because most people's relationship with money developed during childhood. You need to identify why you feel the way you do about money so you can send coherent and consistent messages to your kids. When both parents focus on their money stories, children receive positive messages. Getting your money stories straight does not just mean that you agree on basic issues such as allowances and college savings. It also means that both of you have agreed to identify certain basic money values you want to teach your children, such as giving is good, working hard is its own reward, and you don't always get everything you want.

3. Facilitate financial reflection

As with most decisions kids make, when it comes to money decisions they are frequently impulsive. As a financially intelligent parent, you want to teach your children how to think in terms of choices, alternatives and consequences. This is called reflective thinking. Learning how to reflect both before and after making a decision is a great life skill, and one that is the hallmark of people who make good choices in everything from careers to relationships to investments. Financially intelligent parents teach their children to evaluate financial consequences based on available choices rather than making impulsive decisions. As a result, children recognize that there are many options available and they acquire the skill to make good choices.

4. Become a charitable family

By teaching your children that they can do more with money than spend it on themselves, you encourage them to become more compassionate and caring. By participating as a family in volunteer and community activities, you help your children develop empathy and a sense of responsibility to others. Your children will realize they have the power to make life better for others. Because children learn through modeling behavior, you have to do more than write a check to charity. You need to show your children what it means to help others. Modeling charitable behaviors, including volunteerism, can jump start your child's empathy and desire to help others.

5. Teach financial literacy

Although it is important to teach children how to balance a checkbook and create a budget, to become truly financially literate your children must learn within a context of values and money behaviors. Your children need a combination of concrete examples, their own experiences and financial reflection. If they do not learn to behave responsibly with money as kids, they will have to learn as adults when the cost is much higher. One of the best tools to teach your children financial literacy is an allowance. Approaching allowances in a consistently constructive way allows you to instill decision-making wisdom in your children rather than controlling them. An allowance also helps your children gain a well-balanced perspective about money, encouraging saving, investing and giving, in addition to spending.

6. Awareness of the values you model

Your children are tuned in to your purchasing decisions. The ways you spend your money sends messages to your children about your values and life priorities. Children also notice how you spend your time and your actions can unintentionally send messages you did not intend your children to receive. When you miss opportunities to spend time with your children in order to put in extra hours at work or manage your money, you are sending a message that money is more important than family. Financially intelligent parents are highly conscious of their spending habits, as well as how they balance their work and family time, and the values they communicate.

7. Moderate extreme money tendencies

Extreme money tendencies can evolve into money disorders which cause chaos within your family and send the wrong messages to your children. There are several types of money disorders, ranging from excessive shopping to racking up credit card debt to excessive frugality. Regardless of the disorder, extreme money tendencies cause your children to experience confusion and insecurity in their lives. Financially intelligent parents learn to recognize and moderate extreme money behaviors.

8. Talking about the tough topics

Parents avoid talking about financial topics that make them uncomfortable or that seem too complicated. Although you model good money behaviors in certain ways, unless you compliment these behaviors with good money conversations, you are not being as effective as you could be. Financially intelligent parents recognize teachable times each day that give you and your children the opportunity to talk about financial issues. You should welcome these opportunities, as difficult as they are, to discuss and reflect on financial decisions.

A free-reprint article written by: Eileen Gallo, Ph.D., and Jon Gallo, J.D, © 2005

Reprint Terms

- You can publish this article electronically in publications, websites, and ezines as long as the bylines and hyperlinks are included.
- You are not allowed to use this article in unsolicited commercial email. This article MUST be distributed via opt-in email only.
- If you use this article we request that you send a copy or link that contains the article to dsafkow@fiparent.com.

Eileen Gallo, Ph.D., and Jon Gallo, J.D. are experts on children, families and money, and the authors of The Financially Intelligent Parent: 8 Steps to Raising Successful, Generous, Responsible Children (New American Library/Penguin Group). For more financially intelligent parenting tips and tools, visit http://www.FIParent.com.


MORE RESOURCES:

ABC News

Media exposure a challenge for parenting skills
Great Dad, California - 25 minutes ago
It's possibly one of the thorniest challenges facing modern fathers looking for the best parenting advice - how to ensure your child manages to enjoy and ...
Smart Ways to Manage Kids’ TV, Music, and Web Time U.S. News & World Report
all 94 news articles


Learning Parenting 101: Better Late Than Never
Hartford Courant, United States - Dec 1, 2008
Welcome to Parenting 101, a two-part introduction to the fundamentals of effective child-rearing. Upon passing this course, which will conclude with next ...


Obama victory encourages parenting advice
Great Dad, California - 25 minutes ago
And yet he's still an excellent parent who finds time for his daughters," he told the news provider. In a speech in Chicago this past Father's Day, ...


Dr. William Sears to Talk on Child Nutrition & Parenting
Honolulu Advertiser, HI - 8 hours ago
Parents, grandparents and childcare providers are invited to attend his seminars on Monday, December 8th at 7pm or Tuesday, December 9th at 10am at the New ...


ENERGYPARENTING(R) is the Antidote to the ADHD/Ritalin Epidemic
MarketWatch - 12 hours ago
It is a new way to parent that upends existing parenting models by transforming challenging children without the need for medication. ...


The Canadian Press

Culinary bad boy Anthony Bourdain dishes on parenting and food
The Canadian Press, MIAMI BEACH - 16 hours ago
MIAMI BEACH — After spending years introducing television viewers to unusual eats from around the globe, culinary bad boy Anthony Bourdain is focused on a ...


Gay adoption ruling favors good parenting over sexual orientation
Sun-Sentinel.com, FL - Dec 2, 2008
As a parent myself, all I can do (and it is not enough) is commend Miami-Dade Circuit Judge Cindy Lederman for a fair and just ruling, which put the welfare ...
Fair ruling benefits children MiamiHerald.com
New blow to adoption ban Palm Beach Post
all 7 news articles


Examiner.com

(ie San Francisco hiking, San Francisco parenting)
Examiner.com - 19 hours ago
by Tim Wright, Houston Workforce Performance Examiner Change is not just something leaves do. Change occurs in our efforts to improve profitability, ...


The Learning Community Provides Free Parenting Resources Via ...
PR Web (press release), WA - 32 minutes ago
The Learning Community, a non-profit organization dedicated to helping parents with free parenting resources, announces the launch of its newly redesigned ...


Anderson court records detail accused killer's commitment to parenting
Anderson Independent Mail, SC - Dec 1, 2008
In 2006, family court officials ordered both parents to submit to drug tests and to comply with court-ordered behaviors, including the exposure of their ...

Parenting - Google News

Catalogue 4 Shopping UK offers thousands of low priced, top brand products in a variety of categories including fashion clothing, sportswear, DIY, electrical for home and garden. Remember it is often cheaper to shop via catalogue4shopping.co.uk than going direct, so bookmark us now (Ctrl +d) Enjoy your shopping.

Additions Direct Catalogue Home Cloggs Direct Cosmetics
Jones Bootmaker Dress For Less Figleaves JD Sports
Lands End Lingerie Confidential Littlewoods Catalogue Marks And Spencer
Mothercare Catalogue My Tights Outdoor Gear Simply Beach
Thomas Pink Top Brands Direct Marshall Ward